I woke up feeling a little off today. And then I remembered “who have I not forgiven?” It’s a simple thing, but I grabbed my journal and started writing.

I realize that I have not forgiven myself. I have not forgiven myself for past mistakes — for areas where I was under the veil of consciousness. For times where I wasn’t present or aligned with the Universe and for times I just didn’t know better.

A Course in Miracles teaches us that it is never too late to start over and we can always begin again. The time is now. In my daily work that I do every day, reading from spiritual texts, meditation, journaling and praying. I make sure to write out my gratitude list, and I pray for those that are driving me crazy! I pray for those that I hold a grievance and I always make sure to pray for blessings and abundance and peace for everyone that I love.

Codependency has been a central core in my life. And healing from it is no easy task but very doable. It’s like going to the gym – you have to do it everyday. One of the biggest stumbling blocks that have been in my way is that feeling of shame. That feeling of “there’s no way that I can be happy because I made so many mistakes, or I hurt  people because I was in pain”. The universe is just waiting for us; for the slightest invitation to begin again. I’ve been doing this daily for a while now (even though I was aware of A Course in Miracles and recovery since ‘91)— but a few things happened to me about two years ago that forced me to really get serious with this work.

I am amazed as I look back on old journal entries. God always answers my prayers, maybe not in the exact way that I envisioned – but actually better. And forgiveness is so important in this journey. Get the monkey off your back already and experience forgiveness. Try it  30 days! 

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